Why the indecision? Here are my states of being:
I am happy and safe and grateful and loved and employed and well fed (just ate a whole tube of Ritz with a chunk of aged cheddar cheese and a glass of Malbec - nice!) and all of the things that make a girl glow in her writings as well as in person.
On the other hands, I am lonely and confused and tired and stressed and a bit malnourished (please review what I just ate...that is the third time I have had that exact thing for dinner...ugh) and all of the things that make a girl whine in her blog as well as to her friends.
It can get a little tricky monitoring which side of me gets to come out and play. I prefer the happy, grateful, blahblahblah side of me, of course, but I feel that sometimes that specific act cheats me of bouncing ideas and situations off of my girlfriends - in effect, not giving them the chance to share with me the advisement they are sure to have collected over the years. I forget that I don't have to figure out what to do or how to proceed all by myself all of the time.
But, the trouble with letting my Debbie Downer out for a stroll? Sometimes she just doesn't want to come home! Sometimes I am stuck in my whirlpool of emotions and ambiguity with no desire to climb out and dry off. That plain sucks. No one wants to be around that. Including me.
So, I am going to bed. Whichever one of me gets up in the morning gets to share next - and don't you even worry...there are plenty of anecdotes to support all angles. Buckle in, my friends. We have some reading and writing to do.
;)t
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