"Quart? Are you still coming over tonight?" D asks with some bewilderment attached. I have yet to drive to Denver since the weekend before last...a complete change in the schedule we have kept for the last year and three months.
But I am going tonight. And I am excited.
We have disected the weekend (his idea) to find our disconnect, and to make sure it doesn't happen again. Communication seems to be the biggest factor - I assume much more than I actually ask. He doesn't tell me because he assumes I already know. What a mess.
But MOST importantly, I had some decisions to make and some growing up to do. I know, hard to believe, ah?
I am the one who put myself in the precarious adoring girlfriend position. That in itself does not entail me to any special privileges...more, it puts me at a disadvantage. I cannot expect someone else to give as much as I do just because it's fair.
I have to pull back so that I don't get so resentful, so dissillusioned - so...so...DRAMATIC!
Yes, I am embarrased and yes a bit redfaced, but I am determined to practice this relationship skill NOW while it matters so that I won't have to put anyone else through this brain damage.
And you won't have to cringe for me so much in the future when you read my posts! :)