1.20.2007

And so a new day begins...


I am a firm believer in recreations, revamping, renewing, and a brand new day for everyone. I also believe that when we have fully processed things from our past we should no longer hold those issues close to us - get rid of them. FGS, don't FORGET them, because then we will be forced to repeat the experience.

I loved having you all in my life...you brought me only the greatest of everything. Thank you for your opinions, your advice, and your sharing of common goals and dreams.

I am sure that I will "run into" many of you again another day - but for today, I got's to go!

Much love,

terri

1.12.2007

Hooba-who?


So, one of the fantastically fun things I did in my incommunicado state is go to a Hoobastank concert with a coworker.

(this is Halifax in the pic with me...doesn't it look like he is gonna step on my head?)

Agent Sparks played first - a high energy co-ed band, with such great synergy that we were sure the lead singer and guitarist were either married or in love. I offended the drummer by telling him later that he reminded me of Jared Leto. "Because I am short and have dark hair?", he mumbled. Believe me - I understand. At least his band played AND sang all of their own music and did not even once expect the audience to do their vocals for them.

Next up was Halifax - and oh, you must go check them out. I was so proud of the show they put on...it is very difficult to entertain at the Bluebird Theatre on nights that they have the 21 and younger crowd in the balcony. That is their main demographics, fgs! What they end up with is a balcony of crazed fans and then the older crowd up next to the stage. Hence all of the elbow room during the opening band performances. The lead at one point was bemoaning the fact that he could not crowd surf without the minors on the floor to catch him - which I was quick to interject that of course he could jump! I was there to catch him...and while we both knew that I couldn't, he acted like it could be a very real possibility. Then I spent the rest of their set afraid that he was going to jump and I was going to drop him on his head.

(they stood right here while I forced my stupid little concert cam to finally get a shot...)

We had met up with two girls earlier in the night who were Hoobastank guests. They had the swag and the wristbands to prove it. Whitney and I fell right into the lap of good fortune by being nice to them...the rest of the night was a swirl of meeting band members of all three bands and getting VIP passes to hang. Hoobastank put on an amazing show...they hit every single power note, chord and beat - so enjoyable. So much energy and talent. And of course they played the obligatory "The Reason" to the delight of our two new friends. Unfortunately, one of them had gotten so blasted on white zin (who in the h*ll drinks white zin at a show??!!) that I basically carried her like a mannequin for the remainder of the meet and greets backstage. As soon as we talked to everyone we wanted to, I did a very shameful thing. I left drunkard sitting on a chair and out the door we went. I know, I know...you don't have to say a word.

(Hoobastank lead - how can they possibly be so young?)

We continued our night looking for something to eat - after all kitchens in Denver were safely closed of course! Just when we had finally given up, the bodyguard at the last bar/diner we stopped at offered to run and get us food from 7-11. Not only did we dine on the greatest nachos ever known to man, but they also bought our drinks.

( I am not trashed - I just take bad pics sometimes. Really bad.)

The night was perfect...THAT is what a show night is supposed to look like, 30STM!

1.10.2007

Time Keeps on Ticking...


Bloggity bloggity blogblogblog...yes, I guess I do need my blog. Sad, isn't it, the ties that bind?:)

I want to start off by saying that, yes, I have been depressed. Not so much that I needed to be admitted anywhere, but enough that it showed up finally in my body. And it is going to be okay - I am going to be a big girl about things and face whatever comes head on.

When my breasts started to grow to monstrous (for me) proportions and then hurt so bad that I couldn't bear to wear anything but tank tops in the 20 degree weather we are having, I started to wonder if there was a problem. Pretty quick on the uptake, huh? When BigJer found a large lump in my left breast, I decided that I had breast cancer. I decided how I would handle chemo and radiation, picked out my fantasy wig, and even had a double mastectomy with total silicone replacements all planned out to a "t". Somewhere along this mind-screw, I decided that I was going to do everything that I have been denying myself but really, really wanted to do before I die.

I planned a road trip. A great big wonderful long road trip. I even cleaned off my credit card. I mapped it out - complete with mileage and google maps. Good thing that I didn't start calling people and letting them know that I was on my way - because I got really sick. Lack of being able to sleep, pain radiating from my gawdawfulhuge breasts, and a temperature flat kicked me on my butt. Although I had an appointment to see my doc at the end of the week for a much needed (ya think?!) check up, I decided to call again to try and schedule an earlier meeting.

Guess what? I am not pregnant. (You all know you were thinking it...and that's okay. So was my doctor.) Know what else? Not really all that crazy either. Turns out I am severely hormonally imbalanced. Yep - going through puberty again in a sense. And you know what else? I have probably been unbalanced for, oh, probably a year and a half now. And my doctor thinks it has been brought about by my stress level. Hmmm.

Puts everything in a neat little box with a ribbon, doesn't it? NOT crazy. Depressed, yes...but with a reason. That is very freeing to me.

So, I put away the credit and gas card, filed away my maps, canceled my imaginary long blonde rock star wig and my imaginary brave smile that I was to wear while battling through chemo. Instead, I will start on progesterone tomorrow. And I will have a mammogram, and perhaps even a nutritional evaluation to make sure that I am doing kind things for me other than racing to and from every show I can get tickets to. And I will cut down on coffee, even if it means that I won't be able to work with the camera until the wee hours of the night.


And I will still do a few things that I want to make sure and get done before I die, because there is no time like the present.

I have missed you! Hope your holiday season was wonderful!
:)t

Oh Haiiiii!!

I was so afraid that my blog had disappeared- I mean, I haven't actually logged in for a couple of years, but still, shouldn't it be...